the email

today i got an email from a girl that i found on craigslist who was a Mass Art student that was looking for a roommate. the email was very positive and excited about Mass Art. she had even transferred from SCAD which she hadn't liked. so it balanced out some of the horror stories i had heard through my grandpa (who was involved in an art college and very connected to the world of art school at the moment) and from student reviews. granted one person isn't me, but hey, it was nice to hear someone so excited, it got me more excited.

so i am looking forward to heading out east this fall, though i am pretty sad to be leaving my friends and some family behind. ah well, it'll be a fun adventure!

the end

this is post 51, divisible by 17.

i'm going to Mass Art next year.

it came down to reviews by students that i read. i am not fully confident with my choice, but am sticking with it and we'll see how it goes.

but i will be happy to be near family, in a great city, and at a school with lots of space (even if the buildings aren't super well maintained, the heating was broken when i visited, it was HOT HOT HOT!)

ahhh, it's nice to have chosen, now time for paperwork.

the game

i just had my friend and her mom play rock, paper, scissors while i had predetermined which person was which of my two schools. her mom won, meaning i would go to Mass Art.

i was rather happy with that decision, but as time passes i get more and more questioning of any decision i make, rather than just being happy with a choice.

today i also started a pro list for each school, listing positive attributes of each school. it only proves more of everything i have said before... MICA has a strong argument with great housing options and a solid environment, where i know i would get a good education and such. but as much as i love it as a school and think i would be happy there, it also seems a little intense and too distant from any other college students and people i know and love, etc, etc. i do have a friend there, but it just seems scary to go to an unknownish area. although i have spent a lot of time there and completely LOVE LOVE LOVE one of the museums there, especially their gift shop.

Mass Art is unknown in the education realm since i have no experience there and the reports from students seem a little more wishy washy than those of MICA's faculty. yet, it seems comforting to be lost in such a crazy, busy world, rather than the intensity of MICA. perhaps i am just avoiding MICA, i don't know. the benefits of the atmosphere of boston and the people i know around and the college city, seems perhaps like something to leap and see if the education is more than it appears. there is a chance i am also making their education seem evil in my head just because it isn't as "perfect" or "superior" or whatever as some other schools may seem to me.

the uncertainty

so as i did a few days ago i choose a school. last time it was Mass Arts, this time it is MICA. yet i feel as unsure with this decision as i did with the other.

last time my mom told me i had enough money to go to MICA, which made me rethink it. this time, my art teacher said location does have its place. both statements did not make me want to go, rather they took me back to square one, where i had to choose between the two again, reorganize my priorities.

at this point, MICA seems solid as a good education (for me!) and Mass Arts is solid locationwise in boston near family and a maine getaway. having family means i am loaded with options to have access to family, family meals, cars, etc.

so if only MICA was in boston (my dad adds with california weather) i would be super excited and content in most every way.

as this is not the case, i guess i shall pretend to have chosen MICA, but my being continues to be left stirred up and not satisfied with either decision. in reality, almost no decisions satisfy me. maybe i will end up at Puget Sound after all.

the research

as my decision gets down to the wire, my mom and i have talked and talked and argued and talked and got to a place where choosing between Mass Art and MICA feels like a tossup, not because they are the same, but because they both offer aspects that will make me happy, as far as we can see.

so now we are researching and searching, looking at ratemyprofessor.com to get an idea of teachers in the fields i am looking into and rankings of schools to find statistics and reasons behind these lists, not simply going to the "best one" because Mass Art doesn't even rank onto these lists.

What I found encouraging for some reason is the freshman retention rates:
Mass Art 84.2
MICA 85.5
CCA 74.5

Granted they don't mean to much, there are lots of factors to consider there and such. But looking at statistics seems concrete and gives me a little sense of something.

after looking up professors, Mass Art's ceramics department seems like it could be either/or, great or bad. MICA's seems strong and about where my expectations of it would be in line with my experience with their ceramics department.

MICA is looking more appealing, i simply have a fantasy about going to Mass Art in boston near family and maine, etc. plus after i will have some money leftover.

although MICA has given me an additional three thousand a year for going to their pre-college program or something of that sort, Mass Art still appeals to ME financially after school is over. i have tons of support and will make it through school no matter where i go, but that future next egg gives me so many options after school, i am just scared that Mass Art's education might be a bust for me, but i will have no way of knowing until i go there. MICA seems safe and familiar since i have been there and can trust that it will be a good school for that reason.

the woah

so i was sitting in my bed doing this weird decision process making game thing that someone showed to me that involves cards and ordering the factors from most important to least important.

well i was looking at the factor that said "glass dept" and although it was at the bottom, my brain was thinking about it and how since all my schools had a glass department i could just take it out, but then i got to thinking and realized that MICA lacks a glass department. so now i am rocked, i have an excuse to say i don't want to go there and rick getting a horrible education at Mass Arts and have money left over to start my own nest egg or travel, whichever i prefer. hmmmm, woah!

the waffling

waffles sounds about a 2384729852093850912490182490 times better than deciding on a college. i told myself i would decide by this past weekend.

based on a million random factors that may seem petty to others, i am mostly deciding between MICA and MassArts. i hate making a decision right now, since there is so much going on and so many different reasons that each school is worth attending.

so i visited Puget Sound. it was amazing. beautiful campus with a great sense of a place to be and location and it was marvelous. but I love the sunshine and I don't think I could handle all those clouds. plus my reasoning is that i should attend an art school first and see if i really want to do art, then go "oh shit, oh shit" and transfer or take a year off.

CCA is a great school, perhaps better than the other two art schools, i have no idea. it's hard for me to tell about each school's teaching staff. the only thing i can see is that CCA has about 4 times as many professors as MassArts, but MassArts website seemed to not be updated in terms of teachers because the woman i know who works there was not listed. so in short again, i'm confused.

anyway i rooted out CCA, despite my desire to stay in california because california rocks in my opinion (minus any budget complications and earthquakes that are going on here), is because as much as a like it, it has a split campus and no meal plan and kind of questionable housing. perhaps i am being too hard on it, but i have to decide somehow, no matter how petty or material or stupid my decision may be/seem. i want the liberal arts college experience, but one doesn't really find that at the art schools i choose, so i am doing my best at finding art schools that get close to meeting the requirements. maybe i'm wrong, maybe i am making the worst choice in my life, i won't know until i go.

MassArts seems to be lacking in the staffing area possibly, etc, etc. but yet I still want to go there, probably for the money and the location. i would get to be close to a new set of family and stuff. yet there is snow and the school seems questionable in certain ways.

MICA plain rocks, it is most like a college experience and is perfect and they send me tons of stuff in the mail that encourages me to go more and more, stuff on careers and about their school, except for the fact that it is the most expensive and is in baltimore.

so i have no idea what to do. i just want to decide.

the cool

my lame post about being accepted to MICA and Syracuse barely covered the basics of that moment. more importantly, in this huge packet of stuff i received from MICA on my acceptance there was a handwritten letter from my admissions counselor. it makes one wonder if she wrote to select people or all the people accepted from the region she covers. anyway, since it was personal, cool, and interesting i thought i would share. above is the scanned version of the letter.

the real wait

today i got news from Oberlin. i have been waitlisted, which makes my decision super easy... NO!

so i will visit Puget Sound just for kicks, then continue to decide about the others.

obviously, i am not going to CSULB with all my other choices that outrank it stupendously (there is nothing wrong with it, i simply prefer the others.)

i am pretty confident about my decision to go to art school. which leaves to more or less choose from: MICA, CCA, and Mass Art. MICA and Mass Art both offer an art education department at their schools, which is rather appealing, along with offering a bit more of a unified, college experience. so i am leaning towards them, although i sincerely don't want to leave california or perhaps i'm just getting attached as i get closer to graduating.

in all honesty, my secret plan is to go to Mass Art, save some money and return to california, rather than spend tons of moola elsewhere. thank you for all my family telling me to shut up about money, but this is my logic. and i am not going to apologize.

the oops

well, i just wrote a long post about i don't even know what and realized i meant to write about how i was still waiting to hear from Oberlin and i am pretty nervous since i haven't heard from them yet.

based on their location, i am hesitant to go there, but reading about the school, it sounds like a good fit, or at least i'm interested in it. i just want to hear news from them, instead of waiting impatiently, unsure of whether they just have written me off and will never tell me about my acceptance status. i mean, i don't know if i would really mind getting rejected, then i would know what it feels like... to actually get rejected. or maybe it would just kill my already non-existant self-esteem.

the wait

many of my friends are hearing back and getting bad and good news. it's hard to react when people get rejected, it sucks, but there's not much you can say to make them feel better. well there are things, i'm just not good at it.

the waiting seems to be difficult, one of my friends is going to like explode, and has been on the verge of exploding, for the past week because UC Berkeley's decisions are coming out tomorrow.

for me, hearing back from schools from early action and special events and working on aplications later because of the art schools who have later due dates has allowed me not to really have much time to sit and worry about getting in. i got in to one place befoe i finished applying other places and it has made the rest of my journey easier i think. perhaps this is all just blab because it is after midnight.

harder for me is the deciding and dealing with unsolicited advice and opinions getting slingshot at me from every direction. granted, i appreciate them all highly and take them into consideration. each place offers such good aspects that i find it hard to decide when i get so many opinions and know i would be happy at all of them. so it's my job to filter and figure out what i want, me, me, me! ah, the college process is so selfish.

yet so annoying, cause people continue to ask me about my decision. well folks, i haven't made it. and trust me, when i do, you will hear about it! cause after i rejected Syracuse, i was excited and wanted to go shout off a cliff. not because i rejected something, but because it's satisfying when i make a decision, because i waffle a lot and am very indecisive.

hmmm, i kind of write this as if some mother or child is going to find this and read it along their college quest, but it's very doubtful. oh well, maybe if i leave it up long enough, some person will find some comfort in it, or help?

the rejection

high school seniors are moaning and groaning about getting rejected from schools, but there is the other side that i just realized isn't considered. we then have to reject all the schools that accepted us that we don't want to attend. granted, it is not such a personal attack to reject the school rather than the school rejecting the individual.

today i informed Syracuse that i was not going to enroll there. i sat and had qualms with my mom for a few minutes and then clicked the button, mainly because i want to make the $12,000 a year available to someone else, since i have the same opportunity at a school i am more likely to attend (Puget Sound).

so today, i had my first rejection, except i was rejecting them instead of them rejecting me... unless you count me deciding not to finish my application to Cal Poly.

the other

yesterday i heard from Puget Sound, i'm in with a scholarship.

i am slightly considering liberal art schools again with their hefty scholarships, but they are still more expensive than Mass Arts.

lastly, a note on my college experience, i choose schools i was pretty confident about getting into because i was looking for a place where i would be able to not work as hard as i have been in high school. not to say i am lazy, but i was a little more relaxed of a pressure, so that i can enjoy my learning experience a bit more and get more from it as a person, rather than just working myself to the bones.

i decided i wanted to experience life, rather than just push myself to be perfect.

that's why i have had such good luck getting into schools, i think.

the two new

MICA accepted me
so did Syracuse.
both with scholarships.

woo.

i'm not going to Syracuse, it's too cold for me.

the end

so i finished my application to MICA last week in a mess of stress, which was no fun before i left for a week in boston to see family and look at MassArts.

done with MICA's application, i had only my portfolio for Cal Poly left to finish, but over break i decided to not finish the portfolio because i do not want to go there and do not want it as a safety school since...

i have made it into MassArts and CCA. at the admit on the spot day, which was very strange, after a lot of waiting i met with a woman who told me i got in. then i was able to go home. i was expecting an interview so to just wait and have her simply tell me was so odd.

now done with all my applications, i have to decide where i am going. now awaiting responses from my liberal art schools and MICA, which may not want to attend, i have to research and decide what schools have what i really want and where i want to be.

more on my decisions and ideas will come later on, this is just a simple update as i watch a stupid documentary for school about china, which is not teaching me anything.

the thursday

so on thursday i finished my application for CCA, which means all i have left is my MICA application due on the 12th (in order to be considered for scholarships).

meaning i need to get on my essay, especially since i have plans to be gone next weekend.

i still need to decide if i am going to submit a portfolio to Cal Poly since i don't think i want to go there.

and i got a portfolio off to Syracuse within a day or two of my horrible post.

mostly i have been working on my college stuff at home and during my special projects art class. it's nice to have focus time and my art teacher to help me out, especially after my mom left. i had him and my mom both edit my essays when they were important to me because i feel like having more people look over it and some more brain power from people who know me well, will help make sure i am saying what i want to say to colleges.

the avoiding

well today i did not attend my Oberlin interview because i needed some rest and relaxation, which has involved watching a movie with my mom and chores. i have felt like i've been busy and going lots of places and not really having any down time at home, so i decided to stay home.

on the other hand, it would have been a great experience and practice for me. but coming down to it, i didn't really want to go, they are not my first choice, and my mom pointed out if they asked me if i wanted to go there the truth would be maybe or even no.

so since i didn't want to act, someday i'll go have a real interview. i do not regret my decision, only a teeny tiny part of me wishes i had gone, but not enough of me to really make much of an impact. i did email them though to make sure that even if it looks bad not going, it isn't a full just not going.

the fuck-up

fuck fuck fuck. i received an email from Syracuse telling me that i was missing a whole list of items from my application, including an art portfolio, which i was not aware that i needed.

perhaps it is a sign i should not go to Syracuse?

the part that frustrates me the most is that everything was due on the first of january and i am not sure, but i'm pretty sure, that they still want me to turn the missing parts in. so i will email them and still turn the stuff in and fuck that if they don't want me because i turned things in late. that is their choice and i have plenty of other options, well at least one at this point.

on a brighter note, i checked Oberlin and Puget Sound and it seems i do not need portfolios for them at this point in time, so yay! secondly, i found out my friend is going to MIT, so if i end up in boston, i will have a friend around, which makes me 4 times happier to go to boston, especially cause he's a guy and i would be at art school which involves a huge percentage of girls to boys and something tells me i will need more testosterone in my life.

the blah

my weekend was confusion and a mother home not when i expected, which both caused me to not work on college applications at all, as well as my general laziness.

luckily as i said in my other post, all i have left is supplements for Oberlin and Puget Sound. these just require some time and focus. my mother and i did talk about both of them, so i have some general direction about what i am going to write.

unluckily, this week is finals week. tonight i have a killer night for studying, but we'll see how that goes. in other words, i will be doing my supplements wednesday night since they are due on friday and i am leaving for disneyland on thursday.

i decided to turn my application in for MICA in later on with my other art school applications because it was due today and i needed to mail it so i couldn't send it over the weekend and have it get there in time.

after Oberlin and Puget Sound, i have only CCA, MICA, and OCAD left. and i am considering not applying to OCAD because i do not think i want to go to school in canada anymore, but we'll see. it might be easy because i have no essays for the school that i can see. i'll need to double check.

also for Oberlin i have scheduled an interview with them on the 23rd of january up in san francisco. it'll be interesting to talk to them, even though i'm pretty sure i'm going to art school. i mostly signed up for this as an opportunity, knowing i can cancel if need be.

lastly, i am trying to make it so i can go up to CCA with my application on feb 13th for a special "admit on the spot day." this is where they will review my application and tell me if i got in that day. this will be helpful for me because a few hours after the event starts i am flying to boston, where i will be looking at MassArt. since CCA and MassArt are my first choices, it'll be interesting to compare the two closely especially if i get into CCA, or i'll know i need to find somewhere else if i dislike MassArts.

the url

so for my common application art supplement i had to have a website url for pictures of my artwork. unable to make a professional website, i simply made another blog for the pictures i wanted to share with the schools. i figured since it is part of the school process and will let people get more a sense of me, here is my url: http://luciadill.blogspot.com/

the new year fun

i spent the first half of my new years eve and the day previous working hard on my common app in order to meet the deadline for Syracuse which was the first.

happily after editing essays over the phone with my mom and lots of effort and bleary eyes, i finished my application around 6 or 7, perfect timing for me to go and spend time out and about on the new year's eve. it also gave me some space to rest easy for the rest of break.

not for the common app all i have is to finish two supplements by january 15! oh, and to pay. these should take some work, but i have started filling them out, i mostly just have some shorter responses that are more specific to answer. for example, i have to tell both Oberlin and Puget Sound how i found out about them and why i want to go and what they will do for me. this i find difficult because i honestly have no idea how i found out about Puget Sound. probably on naviance?

i also received a letter from MICA a while ago offering me an opportunity to apply at a "special" date because i attended the summer program and had a portfolio review with them. this is basically another early action deadline, which is january 11th, so hopefully i can get my shit together, write the essay they need, put a revised portfolio together and get it sent soon. time is a wasting.

other than that, i have two art schools after that to apply to in february, and then i will be done. perhaps i will just do them early this weekend while i am in a flurry of working on applications. plus i already know i got accepted to one art school, so if i put a little extra care into my application for CCA, my other first choice art school, even turn that application in early, i should be at least a good candidate.

i often disappoint myself with how well i work on these things, but since i've gotten about one third of my college applications done, i feel like maybe this week and weekend i could kick ass and take names with my applications, unlike over christmas break.